Dear man in the maroon shirt who passed by me at the deli counter this morning,
I fully respect your decision not to shower, wear deodorant, or wash your clothes, because hey, it's your life and you can do what you want with it. Sometimes, when I'm especially tired or just don't have time, I skip the shower, too. I also don't wash my clothes after one wear, because it feels like a waste and usually they shrink in the dryer, so it takes one wear to get them back to the right fit. I can't say I skip the deodorant ever, unless I forget, but that's because I am paranoid the consequences will be disastrous.
You should know that I write this because today, as you passed behind me while I waited in line to buy sliced turkey, you had reached disaster point. Again, I appreciate your right to do as you please with your own hygienic routine, but I do beg of you, if you choose to continue on this path, could you stay away from close-quartered places of food service? It's just that I only really wanted to spend money on a pound of lunchmeat, and your presence today put me in jeopardy of having to buy the store's entire supply of pita bread because I almost vomited on it.
Just a suggestion.
Thank you,
The mouth-breathing woman who had her face covered by her blue shirt
2 comments:
Oh, you poor thing!!! I totally sympathize with you and I'm sorry you had to endure this. This reminds me of the time I was on the T in Boston and a group of hippies got on the train and there was a terrible smell coming from their direction, and they started smelling each other and asking one another "Do I smell?" Horrible!
you make-ah me laugh. :)
Post a Comment